A Family Survival Guide to a Loved One’s Addiction
When a loved one is suffering from a drug or alcohol addiction, it is difficult for family members to understand what is going on. Their once happy life has been shattered by this addiction and the person that they once knew so well is now a stranger to them. This can be very difficult for a loved one to accept.
Family members often feel lost and confused and uncertain about what to do or where to go for help. They may be in denial or they may put up a fight and struggle to force the addict to face their problem. Loved ones may try and cover up the problem thereby contributing to the addiction. They may cover for the addict at work and take on additional responsibilities as a result of their loved one’s addiction. Family members often feel trapped and alone. But it’s important that the family members of a loved one suffering from an addiction know that they are not alone. There are many things that a family can do to help.
Educate yourself. If you have a loved one that is suffering from an addiction, the first thing you should do is educate yourself on the addictive substance. There are many resources available on the Internet, through various books, and other educational materials. If you are unsure if your loved one is struggling with an addiction, there are also a variety of drug addiction tests available online that you can take that will help you determine if your loved one has a problem.
Seek help. Once you have determined the cause and nature of their addiction, the next step is to seek help. Contact your family doctor or a local substance abuse treatment or drug rehab center. Ask questions. Plan an intervention to confront your loved one. It will not be an easy task and your loved one may initially feel like you are “out to get them” but do not give up on them. A properly planned intervention can be the beginning of the healing process for everyone involved. If your loved one fails to seek addiction treatment on their own, research alternate legal options. Where there is a will, there is a way.
Stop covering for the addict. Stop making excuses for them. Stop lying for them. Above all else, do not continue to live in denial. Accept the fact that your family member has an addiction and that they need help. Don’t contribute to the problem by living in denial. Although it may be easier to turn a blind eye to their behavior, you are not helping them when you do this. Tell your loved one that they have an addiction and that you will no longer support that type of lifestyle. Tell them that you love them and that you will do whatever you can to help them but you cannot and will not tolerate the addiction any longer. Tell them that help is available and that they need to seek an addiction treatment program or drug rehab center. Tell them that you will do whatever it takes to help them during their recovery process but you can no longer contribute to their addiction.
Heal yourself. The best way for a family member to help a loved one suffering from an addiction is to seek treatment for them. Whether you realize it or not, you are also suffering from the effects of their addiction. You may feel unloved, hurt, betrayed or angry about the addiction. You may feel confused or lonely. But you are not alone. Seek out a therapist or counselor that specializes in family addiction counseling. Attend sessions with your loved one during their addiction treatment. Be an active participant in group therapy sessions and attend local community support groups for families who have a loved one with an addiction problem. Through these sessions you will discover that you are not alone and you will be better equipped to be a supportive, contributing partner in your loved one’s recovery.